The Last of the Pelican Daughters (NHB Modern Plays) by The Wardrobe Ensemble

The Last of the Pelican Daughters (NHB Modern Plays) by The Wardrobe Ensemble

Author:The Wardrobe Ensemble [Ensemble, The Wardrobe]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Nick Hern Books


Chapter Three – The Presentation

STORM. Okay, right, check that works, great. Everyone ready?

JOY. Yeah.

STORM. So, we’re gathered here today to celebrate Mum.

Projection: ‘Rosemary Pelican 1953–2020’.

Mum was an amazing person, she was kind…

Projection: ‘kind’ (written in funky clip-art).

Generous…

Projection: ‘generous’ (written in funky clip-art).

Loving…

Projection: ‘loving’ (written in funky clip-art).

…and she didn’t mind being a bit silly sometimes too.

Projection: ‘silly’ (written in funky clip-art).

And we all loved her very much.

SAGE. This is really weird and lovely, Stormy.

STORM. Thanks. Now, as you all know Mum was never very interested in her finances.

MAYA. You can say that again!

STORM. And she didn’t leave the most detailed will in the world, but on page four…

Projection: Image of excerpt from will.

…as I’ve mentioned before, it says: ‘My estate and assets should be divided fairly between my children.’ Note the wording here, ‘fairly’ –

Projection: Image of excerpt from will with ‘fairly’ underlined.

…not equally.

Now it’s taken Joy and I the last eight months to sort out all the paperwork to sell the house but that’s all done now, so thanks, Joy, for helping with that.

JOY. No problem.

STORM. And it looks like, after fees, we should be left with about…

Projection: ‘£250,000’.

…two hundred and fifty thousand, so roughly fifty grand each.

Projection: Graph of how money is divided.

However, given the amount of time I spent caring for Mum, I think it would be fair for us to each shave a little…

Projection: Amended graph of how money is divided.

…off the top of our amounts, to pay me for that time.

Projection: ‘Thank you’ cute cat image.

Silence.

SAGE. Are you serious?

STORM. What I’m suggesting is that we shave ten thousand pounds –

Projection: ‘£10,000 x 4 = £40,000’.

…off everyone’s total, so that we can pay me a modest salary, fifteen thousand a year…

Projection: ‘£10,000 x 4 = £40,000 = 2.5 years at £15,000 per year’.

…for two-and-a-half years of looking after Mum. I think that’s fair.

MAYA. Huh.

JOY. You’re asking us to pay you a salary?

STORM. Okay not a salary, more a gesture of goodwill. Compensation for that time, for that unpaid labour.

MAYA. Okay. Storm, I don’t think you can just decide…

SAGE. Why are you doing this now?

MAYA. Shouldn’t Luke be here to talk about this?

STORM. I’ve already spoken to him, he said he’s happy with what I’m suggesting and he couldn’t be bothered to come.

JOY. Typical.

STORM. And this isn’t me deciding, it’s a request from your sister. It’s why I wanted us all to come together.

SAGE. That’s not why! We’re here to celebrate Mum’s birthday.

STORM. And we are. We are!

SAGE. You’re making this about money and paperwork. She hated all of that shit.

MAYA. I thought you got paid?

STORM. Carer’s allowance.

MAYA. Yeah.

JOY. It’s not a lot.

STORM. Sixty-four pounds a week.

JOY. Just over three grand a year, yes. Look, Storm, I know how much work you did. But if we’re talking about finances, you also lived in this house, rent-free.

STORM. I lost two years of my life, Joy. I was going to go… I was going to… I had plans!

JOY. But you made that choice and we supported you, when you said you would do it.



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