Face to Face : The Art of Human Connection (9781501147746) by Grazer Brian
Author:Grazer, Brian
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Published: 2019-09-16T16:00:00+00:00
CHAPTER 8
In the Public Eye
“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it means to sit down and listen.”
—Winston Churchill
All of us have heard this question hurled at us at some point: What are you looking at? The fact is, not everyone wants to be looked at, or looked at by a certain person, or looked at in a certain way.
Back in my school days, when I didn’t yet understand my learning disability, I was extremely self-conscious. It wasn’t just my teachers that I didn’t want looking at me. I didn’t want anyone looking at me. If I thought I felt someone’s eyes on me or caught them glancing in my direction, I would get defensive and lash out. This led to a fair number of altercations, earning me a reputation as someone who didn’t turn down a brawl.
Consequently, it seemed like there was always someone who wanted to pick a fight with me. When I was fourteen, it was a tough kid from Texas—Jack Jones—who challenged me in the middle of the cafeteria, right in front of everyone (usually the custom was to meet out by the handball courts, where at least the audience would be a little smaller).
“Let’s do it right now, man,” he said, standing up.
As the other students turned to looked at me, I felt the heat rising up through my body. I didn’t want to fight Jack. But I didn’t feel like I had a choice, either. If I backed down, the others might think of me as a coward. If I didn’t, chances were high I’d get my ass kicked.
“All right,” I said. “Let’s go.” And indeed, I got my ass kicked.
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