Devil's Chew Toy by Rob Osler

Author:Rob Osler [Osler, Rob]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: CROOKED LANE BOOKS
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter Twenty-Five

Mates on Dates, Post No. 23

My recent encounter with the clean-cut, devilishly handsome Detective Zane had inspired a Mates on Dates post. I placed my fingertips on the keyboard and waited for inspiration to strike with an appropriate title.

MATES ON DATES: Look, but Don’t Touch!

Right out of the gate, I’m offering a confession: recently I found myself lusting after a guy who I thought might have fascist leanings of the German World War II variety. I know, I know, inappropriate, to put it mildly. For argument’s sake, let’s say I had been right in my character assessment and that the guy (I’ll call him “Mr. Z”) was indeed twenty shades of despicable. However rotten Mr. Z’s insides, they hadn’t spoiled my appreciation of his chiseled features and the way his tall, toned frame filled out his blue uniform (that’s all the hint you get ).

My observation that a good-looking creep is still good-looking is hardly a revelation. But is there anything to the notion that a characteristic that should make a person verboten (to continue my Germanic theme) can produce a perverse attraction all its own? We all know the signals: the sexy sneer, the freaky skull tattoo, a barely legal cousin tanning in a Speedo in the backyard. What is it about the edgy, the naughty, and the taboo that sets our pulses raising?

The best I can come up with is that we seek a thrill we don’t get from “the guy next door.” We’re aroused by a dude our better judgment says we absolutely, positively should have nothing to do with. But here is the caution! While looking, even flirting, may be harmless, touching can kill—if not mortally, then emotionally.

So what’s all this got to do with dating? Dating is trial and error. You may have a winner on Tuesday, a total dud on Thursday. You may want a second date with Sylvester, the third romp with Gilles, or memory loss and hand sanitizer after Chad. But the goal for most of us trying to stay afloat in these dating waters is to find a keeper. And a keeper is the guy with whom you are simpatico, maybe not in all things (how boring would that be?) but with enough overlapping interests that you can join together in pursuit of them. Your partner in the game of life should inspire and motivate you to be your better self—and don’t forget it’s your job to do the same for him. So the next time you ask someone out or you are on the fence about whether to accept an invitation for a date, ask yourself: does he seem like a bad boy or good guy? If he is a member of the first camp, feel free to look, ogle, flirt, stare, and fantasize, but DO NOT TOUCH! We’re looking for a spark, not a third-degree burn. Be good to yourself by holding out for the guy who promises to be right for you.

Oh, and as for Mr. Z? Good news! My suspicions about him were wrong.

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